Basis of Understanding

Many years ago, I taught English Language for foreign students and it involved the teaching of the basics. On one occasion, I mentioned the word spheroid and what it meant; some in the class looked confused and so I drew a spheroid and added that the shape of the earth was spheroid. One of the students contradicted me quite emphatically and insisted that the earth was shaped like an egg. No amount of explanation or debate could shake his belief. His teachers and parents had told him that the earth was shaped exactly like an egg and that was that. If one were to tell him that an object was shaped like the earth, he would understand it quite differently from how most of us do.  

Each of us comprehend whatever is being conveyed to us based on various factors that are, when combined, unique to us. No matter how well a message is composed and conveyed, we will always understand it based on these unique factors and therefore are likely to comprehend parts of it imprecisely. The main ones are:


Experiences: We can fully understand all those things that we have experienced. A simple example of this is, those who have tasted a lychee will be able to fully comprehend a statement such as ‘The drink is lychee flavoured’ and those who have not, would only be making some sort of wild guess.

History: Our personal history and that of the land we belong to or even the ones we have lived in, bear an impact on our comprehension. People from a place filled with strife and struggle will have a differing idea of peace and calm than those who have only been exposed to places where there is peace and abundance. The idea of kindness will vary between a person who has a history of trauma to that of a person who has been fortunate enough to have lived a life with a negligible amount of struggle.

 Exposure: Even if we have had limited experiences and our history has not been eventful enough to have a deep impact on our comprehension, it is possible for us to be aware of numerous things if we have the exposure to them. This exposure could be from reading, hearing tales and accounts, watching movies, documentaries and the like. Meeting and getting to know a lot of people also contributes to our exposure. Being aware of certain things aids our comprehension of them. It is a struggle for us to comprehend something that we have never even heard of or bothered much with. It becomes a challenge for us to stay tuned in to a conversation about cricket if we know little if anything about it. Then there are many who have never played a single game of cricket but have deep knowledge about the game from having watched countless number of matches on TV.

 Values: Our values make us who and what we are and rule our thoughts. If life or our background has led us to value kindness, we will understand that somebody’s kind words have come from the heart and greatly value or respect what they are conveying. On the other hand, if kindness is not a priority, the same kind words may come across to us as unnecessary or worse still, hollow and artificial. It’s not to say that those who value kindness cannot make out hollow or artificial words of kindness, they can and do.

 Interest: This one is quite an obvious factor in comprehension and needs very little explanation. If a matter is of limited interest to us, our comprehension of messages about it, will be equally limited. If someone has no interest in reading, he will grasp only a vague version of any message or conversation about books and literature.

 Ease: When we are conversant with something or feel passionate about it, we tend to work on increasing our knowledge and expertise in it. It is but natural for us to comprehend matters related to the things that we are thoroughly at ease with. A software engineer will comprehend almost everything that is computer related while someone like me will probably comprehend a negligible fraction of it.

It is impossible for us to factor in every single person we address whenever we communicate. Do we then take being only half understood as a given? That is not necessary since what we need to do is consider the factors of comprehension and also all the distractions mentioned in my last post and plan how best to convey a message that leaves little room for ambiguity or doubt. 
When it is an important message, it is a good idea to find a polite way to check for comprehension, the standard ‘You know what I mean’ is not good enough. Making someone feel like you think they are of limited intelligence is also an extremely bad idea, so the checking for clarity and comprehension needs to be well thought out. Similarly, when receiving an important message, it is a great idea to rephrase and confirm that we have it right.

These along with a few other facets of communication can put us on the path to being highly effective.